Yay Progress!

I'm super jazzed because yesterday I got Max to sleep during the day

1. in his crib!

2. without swaddling him!

3. for over an hour!

Up until that point he had always only been able to sleep for any reasonable amount of time during the day if he was being held or if he was in my sling. Right when he came home from the hospital he slept during the day I guess- but he was always swaddled- which is not too hard to do- it's just becomes sort of a hassle. In addition- he had only ever slept in the bassinette in our room with the fan on making white noise and usually someone in the room with him. Now- it was raining yesterday during his nap and I think that noise did help- but I can get a sound machine for his nursery.

Anywho- as I'm sure you can guess- there's not a lot you can do while holding an infant- there's not even a lot you can do with an infant strapped to you in a sling because you can't lean over without needing to hold them. This makes chores like laundry and dishes nigh impossible. So- the development (hopefully) of a semi-dependable and independent nap is very exciting for me.

Plus- he looks really cute in his sleep sack- it has a little bear on it that says "Tell me a story".

He is also starting to "play" more- which means that he's happy to be laid down on his activity mat for longer than about a minute and he lays there and looks around and waves his arms and legs around while they bat against things. Our dog Thor is better behaved about this floor time than I expected. He likes to sniff Max as soon as he's on the floor but once he gets a good smell of him he chills out and lays down somewhere else. We do have to pick up the mat when Max isn't on it as Thor will totally nap on it and get it all doggy.

So, while Max is still largely only consoled by near constant nursing- he is making some very important headway. My other mission is pumping milk.

I want to have a "cushion" of supply before I start to use it- it's hard to build this up because:

1. I don't get very much when I pump and

2. I don't usually get a long enough break from actual nursing to fake nurse.

So this means that I pump for ten minutes after each of his night time feedings and I try to sneak it in during the day when I think I can. I want to have a good supply so Jack can babysit- but right now I only have maybe 3 bottles worth and for insurance and the amount he eats I want about 5 to be extra safe. (When Jack and I babysat Dicey we accidentally dropped a full bottle of milk and then nearly ran out of food for her later after she drank almost 2 bottles) Also- to not be back at square one after one babysitting gig.

I guess that's enough for now- I think this is why mommies all hang out together because they can all talk endlessly about stuff that nobody else is as fascinated with as they are.

One Month Old!

So, Max is exactly one month old today! We decided to celebrate by having Jack give him his first bottle ever- so I'd been pumping in readiness and was/am very excited at the prospect of a bit more freedom for me.

He's sucking so hard Jack doesn't even need to hold it!

It was super cute- it took him a little while to get used to- it's cold, it's from a hard plastic container, it's coming from Dad- but he got the hang of it quickly and seemed to enjoy it and then promptly went to sleep and we were able to put him down in his bassinet during the day for the longest time so far. (Normally he doesn't go down outside of someone's arms or my sling during the day for longer than maybe 10 minutes or so).

I have the typical dual-mother reaction though- I'm sort of jealous and hurt that the bottle got him to go down for a nap and I worry about being replaced by the convenience. But I really want to be able to give him bottles for when we travel, when Jack or someone else babysits, et cetera. It's hard to be a mom- you always want things to progress but then you mourn the change.

He grows so fast and it makes me so sad that he won't always be this warm little squashy bean for me to snuggle with after I've breastfed him that I want to cry if I think about it for very long. But on the other hand I am so excited to see him grow and develop and discover. It's rough.

Breastfeeding Advice

So- not that this will be too useful for most of my possible readers- but I feel like writing it down.
These are a few of the things that I have learned from my experience:

1. Get a "My Brest Friend" nursing pillow. I got one as a gift from my sister and her husband and it has been totally invaluable. Nursing is kind of an udgy process- meaning that there are always small adjustments to be made along the way. This fantastic pillow holds his weight so that my hands are free to angle his head or shoulders properly, prop up my boob better, and maybe, just maybe do something UNRELATED to feeding him! Wow. Plus- once you get your stride a little you can hold the pillow and then walk around while nursing!


2. This awesome pillow also has a handy pocket- you should keep lip balm, Lansinoh for your girls, a hair toy, baby nail clippers and maybe your cell phone in there.

3. Bring a book! If you get free hands and can keep your eyes open you will get bored. (clip on book lights come in very handy at night)

4. Try as hard as you can once you get the latch on figured out to look away! Your neck will get really sore from constantly leaning your head down- it is very hard to rip your eyes away from your gorgeous little child- but it will do your neck a world of good.

5. Make someone give you neckrubs- you will inevitably get a sore neck because you have to look down a certain amount.

6. In the hospital if they only show you cross cradle- make them show you the football hold- at first I could not get cross cradle right to save my life and football hold was much easier for both of us- get your companion to help prop up the kiddo with pillows.

7. Above all- keep at it and don't get discouraged- it may take a while and be hard and painful and frustrating- but you will both figure it out if you keep trying.

8. Get the soft cup nursing bras from Target online- they're the only ones I've found so far that are soft enough to be comfy but still supportive, plus they're only $12.99. While you're at it- make sure to get some nursing tanks from there as well- these are great for nightime too.

9. Oh, and always have a cup of water handy- your throat gets so dry doing this you wouldn't believe. I kept my hospital cup and you should too because the lid/straw/handle construction really is convenient- plus since it's covered your water won't go stale between feedings. :)

10. Another product I like are Soothies- these are great when you're starting out and they will give you some in the hospital if you ask. You can also buy them at HEB or wherever. They are cooling gel patches that you can wear under your bra or top between feedings or really just for a minute or so afterwards. They feel great-especially if you refrigerate them- yay!

Car Drama

Yesterday was traumatic- probably moreso for me than for Max in the long run though.

After an uneventful day and shopping trip on the way to the Douglas home we had an incident in the car. He had just started to wake up in his carseat on the drive from his nice long nap so I knew he would be hungry- but until I could get to a good feeding location I was armed with his pacifier. However- he didn't seem to want it and just kept crying and I didn't know why and couldn't do anything about it.


THEN I discover dots of what looks like yellow ochre paint on his hand, the outside of his pacifier, his ear- all over the place- tiny little dots. His diaper had leaked out one leg hole and he had managed to get his hand in it. So he's really upset and we're getting to Selah's as quickly as possible- Jack calls ahead so she can have wipes at the ready.


I whisk him inside while Jack cleans up the carseat and take him to Selah's changing table and get his diaper off while Selah gets a bath ready and then we plop him in there onesie and all and Selah cleans him up.


Dear reader- my baby cries- I'm okay with this and prepared for it- babies cry because they can't talk or express themselves in any way- I just do my best to identify the source and administer solutions and comfort- generally to much success.

Yesterday my baby SCREAMED in that bath. It was loud- louder than I thought he was capable of- it surprised both Selah and I- she said it sounded like an adult screaming. I don't know if he was angry or scared or both- but I hope never to hear it again.


We got him naked in a towel and I nursed him quickly after that and things were much better- it was like it had never happened. He borrowed some clothes from his cousin and we proceeded to have our evening with family.

He was a bit fussy for the rest of the evening though- not really commiting to nursing, not hanging on to his pacifier- not really wanting to play for long (except when he laid down next to Dicey- so cute)


So, we were taking him home and about a third of the way home he started to cry again and wouldn't take his pacifier. Let me tell you- I am really looking forward to pumping and being able to feed him in the car quicky if he needs it.


We pull over to better address his distress and I discover that he is too hot in his carseat and has also what appears to be another leaking dirty diaper. However- my dear husband, who packed our diaper bag with several diapers before we left- more than we would normally need- informed me that we had run out.


I had gotten my baby cool and adjusted the air (the carseat is tricky to temp control because it blocks so much of the a/c when installed correctly) but I couldn't change his diaper and he was still upset- and not wanting to eat. I had to put an unhappy baby back into his carseat and ride home with the knowledge that I couldn't do anything for him yet. It was heartbreaking and I cried all the way home trying to talk to him until he wore himself out, stopped crying and sort of napped.


We got home and I got him inside and naked and changed into a fresh diaper (which was not in fact dirty- there was a stain on his onesie that lied) and did some skin on skin nursing to comfort him and again- it was like it had never happened. We had a normal night and he's happy and calm just like he usually is.


He appears to have forgiven me but I'm still working on forgiving myself.

Woo-hoo!

3 weeks old


So, we had another appointment today for little Max because at his 2 week appt he was not back up to birth weight- but about 2 oz. shy at 7lbs. 12.9 oz. We went back today for his newborn blood test and to weigh him again. Well- drum roll please- he gained TWELVE OUNCES this past week! He now weighs 8 lbs. 9 oz. and I am jubilant because I had actually introduced a pacifier this week and was a little worried that maybe I shouldn't have and that he might not be eating enough.

Also- Doc said that I can pump now and use an occasional bottle starting sometime next week- so that will be a relief and a convenience, especially for visits with in-laws and stuff- plus- I'll be able to leave him for a couple of hours with Jack- I can recharge my battery and know that he'll still be eating well.

I took him to Half Price Books today since I got the okay for visits in public- he likes his sling and he was a hit with my co-workers. They said he looks like Jack but has my eyes- I tend to agree- it's interesting the way that his face is really a combination of both of us. His nose will look like Jack's from one angle and mine from another- stuff like that- I can't wait to see how he changes.

Day of Firsts

So- yesterday was a big day! In the morning after feeding Max on my side in bed so I could still doze we discovered that his diaper had leaked and he needed to be changed- so we took that opportunity to give him his first real bath- he'd only had sponge baths so far. He seemed to really enjoy it- it was fun for the whole family! It helped that we had this cool washcloth duck thing designed to keep his tummy warm throughout.

Then Jack and I decided that we wanted to make a trip to Home Depot. We hadn't taken Max out in public anywhere aside from Doctor's offices so far- because we're still in flu season- but we thought that if we could do the trip in my ring sling and make it short that it would be okay- he just sleeps in the sling primarily and people don't try to touch him or breathe on him- because they can't see him and he's strapped to my body. It went so well that we also went to the grocery store. Mostly I just garnered some smiles from ladies- but one employee at HEB wanted to know if he could breathe in there- (no, he can't breathe- I'm walking around smothering my baby right in front of you). People are goofy. I love my ring sling.

I love the nightlife

Standard Operating Procedure from about 9 or 10 pm until about 11 am (to be done in near darkness so that your spouse can get enough sleep to go to work):

1. When he cries pick up and unswaddle Max

2. Feed him on one side for approx. 30 minutes

3. Burp him

4. Change his diaper

5. Reswaddle him

6. Feed him on other side until he gets very sleepy

7. Lay him down to sleep in his bassinet

Repeat

This procedure is subject to change according to growth spurts, excess diapers, wardrobe malfunctions, and/or general crankiness and, of course, Max's whim.

Regarding the hours between approx. 11am to approx. 9pm- standards have not yet been established.

Two Week Checkup

One week old

Two weeks old

Max checks out fine at 2 weeks- he weighs in at 7lbs. 12.9 oz which is about 2 oz shy of his birth weight- but he is solely breastfed and consequently gains weight a bit slower than formula fed babies of the same age. He has until Tuesday to get back to his original birth weight and they'll also prick his foot again for a newborn wellness exam. : (

He got a bit longer- is now over 22 inches long and in the 88th percentile for his height- (which- to the uninitiated means 88% of other babies are shorter at this point).

His head is smack-in-the-middle-normal and he's on the skinny side- with only 20 odd% lighter than him.

His umbilical cord fell off in the first week but has left a gradually diminishing scab in his super cute belly button that has to be totally gone before we can submerge his body for a real bath.

Jack and I are probably delusional from pride but we are convinced that he is batting at things on purpose- he does it consistently and repeatedly.
But he's apparently not supposed to even be aware that he has hands yet- much less be trying to control them.

In two weeks of life so far he has had 3 manicures- It takes some patience- and he has to be asleep or eating- but it's not too hard with the right clippers.

My Top Ten Memorable Hospital Moments 2/09

10. Bryan and Selah and Dicey keeping my spirits up while I am in labor- Bryan's joke about "Mytube" and "YouSpace" cracks us all up.

9. Our beautiful Asian nurse helping me to get Max latched on properly for the first time- upon seeing my naked breast declares that I have "awesome anatomy!".

8. The two most unexpected and no-one-told-me aspects of labor:
Uncontrollable shivering- harder than any other time in my life- but not really feeling cold, and
being so curled up on my back and pushing so hard that I stimulate my gag reflex and repeatedly puke water and rainbow popsicle all over my sister (the best labor cheerleader ever).

7. Getting up out of bed many hours after birth and not being able to walk properly but needing to use the restroom- Jack helps me and I am shocked at the sheer volume of liquid that leaves my body with seemingly no help from me whatsoever. It continues to sound like I am pouring a pitcher of water into the toilet (even after I feel like I should be finished and able to get up) for at least 2 days.

6. Going through a contraction in the bathroom with my husband (who was helping me navigate through all the accoutrement of giving birth in a hospital) and being so overwhelmed by pain and the gravity of the situation- feeling a bit helpless and scared- that I cried. Jack is a wonderful labor coach and is big and strong and comforting with gentle bear hugs and back rubs through all my contractions.

5. Discovering two immediate joys of breastfeeding: the little squooshy satisfied faces that Max makes when he's full and the unbelievable doughy softness of his cheeks when he's content as I kiss them for the first of many many times.

4. The feeling of the epidural taking effect- like being in a bath and feeling the water fill up around your legs but without feeling wet or any temperature change. This coupled with the feeling of the epidural in full swing where your legs feel like they're asleep when they're still but there is no prickling discomfort when you do move.

3. The knowledge that with the next push I will finally be able to project this little human into the world after having been in some form of labor on and off for close to 24 hours and then pushing for nearly 2.

2. My breakdown and Jack's turning point on our very first full night with our new baby:

Our son had been too cold earlier in the day- (due to a meddling nurse turning down our A/C) and in the middle of the night he was too cold again. Our favorite nurse wanted to give me a chance to warm him up before having to take him away to the NICU again. I was to have skin-on-skin contact with him for awhile and she would come back to check his temp in an hour or so. Please keep in mind that I am at this point really hot myself because of hormones and am already uncomfortable, sweaty and exhausted.

Still new at nursing and only knowing one hold (which I have not mastered by any stretch of the imagination) my tiny crying naked son is placed in my arms. I try to cover his body entirely with the blanket while simultaneously trying to hold my arms and my breast correctly for him to be able to latch on- every little gap in the blanket upsets me to my core and he is still crying and I can't manage to feed him. Jack (who is wonderful) has up to this point been there for me but not entirely- the situation has not fully sunk in until I am naked and sobbing trying desperately to get our son warm and stop his crying and not managing either one.

As if a switch has been turned on- Jack suddenly is a dream of comfort and aide. He holds the blanket while I get Max properly latched on. He makes sure that the rest of me is uncovered because I am so hot that I am sweating through pillows. He makes me drink water when I don't even realize I need it and he magically and repeatedly produces cool wet washcloths and places them on key body parts- my ankles- the back of my neck- the small of my back- etc. He even rewets them when he has determined that they have leached too much heat from me and aren't as cool anymore.

Marie comes back and determines that I have warmed him up enough and that we can keep Max in our room.

After total misery and despair I am suddenly relieved and renewed. From this point forward we are in this together, as an indominable team. Jack remains more attentive then I could have ever hoped or imagined throughout his two weeks of leave.

1. Of course- the actual birth of my son- the thumb in cheek popping sound of his head emerging followed by the feel of his slippery little shoulders. Watching this in the mirror is a memory I will cherish forever as a moment of absolute triumph and joy.

I'm new at this

So, a dear friend of mine asked that I post blogs and she doesn't ask a whole lot- plus my inner diva has been secretly wanting to post a blog for a couple of years now but never felt like I had much to talk about.
However.....
I am (as of February 24th) a proud new stay at home mama and this seems like a good way to keep interested parties abreast of the daily minutia of parenthood and whatever else I may be up to.

Today was supposed to be my first solo mission after my husband went back to work today- he's an HVACR technician and extremely handy. But- my twin sister and her husband with their two month old in tow dropped by 'cause they were in the neighborhood. Then we all decided that it would be a good plan for them to stay for a dinner of the super yummy candy-like beef ribs that are one of my husband's specialties. So, I was only alone until around 1 pm.

Before that was great though- because instead of sleeping during my almost 2 week old son's last long nap this morning I got up and had breakfast and a shower and then a short nap! I felt like super mom- even if it was only for 4 or 5 hours- it was awesome. :)

Tomorrow he has his two week check-up and I'm hoping that he has gained enough weight to be back at his birth weight of 7 lbs. 15 oz. I am also curious about his size percentiles- like length, weight and head size and all that. To whom it may concern- I will keep everyone posted. I must warn you dear reader(s?) that I am a bit too verbose at times- so I will try my hardest to keep these entries shortish and sweet- I am sorry for the inevitable times that I will not manage to do so.

Oh! We received my son's social security card today! He's official!